My Cousin, My Friend

Kami and me. Matching Easter
dresses.  1980 something

Like most babies, I had a flock of family that loved me from the moment I was born.  But I was extra blessed because I have an older, girl cousin, Kami.  She’s five years older than me, and some of my earliest memories involve her. Kami grew up in Kansas, but she visited Oklahoma often to see our grandparents and I would always anxiously await the days she would come to town.

One of my first things I can remember – and I’m digging through 40 years worth of cobwebs in my brain, so this may be inaccurate – is Kami, me, and our great granddad, Jim, on the porch of his and my great grandma Ada’s house in Carmen, Oklahoma.  (That's Grandad Jim in the photo to the right with Kami and me on my first birthday.)  I’m pretty sure Grandad Jim had given us chewing tobacco, and we were spitting it off the porch.  I remember Kami saying, “don’t swallow it, Erica!”  And I wouldn't dare.  I did everything Kami told me to do.  She was my older cousin, I adored her, and wanted to play with her every chance I could.  I wanted to be just like her.

Kami took tumbling, and she was one of those kids that took three steps and did a cartwheel.  Took three more steps, did a cartwheel.  I wanted to be just like her, so she taught me how to do a cartwheel, and pretty soon I was also turning a cartwheel for every three steps I took.  She taught me how to drink pop from the bottle the correct way. She would make up little dances or gymnastics routines and teach me how to do them.  I would tell all my friends how cool my cousin from Kansas was.  I vividly remember telling them one time that she was a good enough gymnast that she could go to the Olympics. 

Easter. Probably 1977.

Kami was in gymnastics; I wanted to be in gymnastics.  She was into Barbies; I got into Barbies.  She wanted to play dress up; I wanted to play dress up.  She rode Grandpa’s horse, Skeeter; I rode Skeeter (years later, I had to tell her that Grandpa sold Skeeter, she didn’t run away like he told us). Kami was a cheerleader; I became a cheerleader (she was more of a legit cheerleader than I).  One year at Christmas, Grandma asked me what I wanted, and I was having trouble coming up with anything.  She handed me Kami’s wish list to help give me some ideas – I copied it word for word.  I really, truly wanted to do everything she did.

As we grew up, I realized that it was more than her activities that I wanted to do.  I wanted to act like Kami.  I was a bratty, mouthy kid, but for some reason, she put up with it and included me anyway.  She was always so pleasant and kind-hearted.  I would mouth off to her, and she would respond, not with tackiness, but with love and politeness.  When our little sisters came along, I treated them like pests. But Kami would make sure they were part of the fun, especially when I wasn’t being so nice.

Kami is the cool one with the fab 80s hair.
 I'm the dork wearing a hat.

Kami was the cool high school kid, and I was a very dorky (again mouthy), awkward junior high kid, and she would still include me. If we went to their house in Kansas, she would take me cruising and would even introduce me to her friends.  Most high school kids wouldn’t admit to knowing a junior high kid, but not Kami.  She was always, always nice, loving, inclusive, and again, pleasant. 

As she went off to college, she got even cooler and was selected as a cheerleader at Kansas State University.  I was still her little country bumpkin cousin, but she still would include me in what she was doing.  We would talk about boys, movies, sports, and life in general.  I was blessed again because my older cousin became one of my best friends.

Kami had her first baby girl 10 years ago, her second one came along eight years ago.  She was an incredible mom and loved those little girls so much.  She was so great at offering parenting advice to me when my little one came along.  She was always teaching them and molding them into good people. When we visited their house in May, the girls were fighting a little, and she kept telling them, "speak kindly to each other!"  What good advice, for now and the future.

Now, I adore Kami for a different reason.  She fought melanoma for more than two years with incredible determination and bravery.  When she received her diagnosis, she did not wait around to start treatment.  She did some research, and found some ways that she could start fighting the cancer on her own.  She learned that sugar could possibly feed cancer, so she completely cut sugar from her diet.  She worked very hard to keep her two daughters' lives as normal as possible. She continued exercising, especially playing tennis.  She grew in her faith.

She started going to MD Anderson in Houston for treatment, and the early treatments looked positive.  But for about a year, it seems like she took two steps forward, and two steps back.  Through it all, she remained positive and very rarely complained.  "Complaining makes it worse," she would sometimes say.  Each bit of bad news was just a setback to her, and she, her doctors, and God had a plan to tackle the next hurdle.  Through all the physical, emotional, and psychological pain, she has remained brave, beautiful, pleasant, positive, faithful, fun, loving, kind-hearted, inclusive, and strong. Oh my gosh, is she strong!  

Once again, I want to be just like her. In the face of adversity like this, I pray that I am only half as brave and positive as she has been through this struggle.

She faced a really harsh setback two weeks ago when she developed pneumonia.  Ultimately the pneumonia took her life.  

I ask anyone that is reading this to please stop and pray.  Pray that God's strength and peace washes over her husband, her daughters, her parents, her sister, our Grandma, and the rest of her family and friends.  Please join me in supporting this wonderful family with your prayers.  She was such a wonderful person and the world isn't as nice without her in it.

Cancer sucks.

Cinnamon Rolls

Carmen Dacoma Elementary School, 1982-83

I went to a consolidated school from Kindergarten to my senior year. The high school/junior high was in Carmen, where I lived, and the elementary school was in Dacoma, 11 miles away--Carmen-Dacoma School.  

To say it was a small school is an understatement.  The photo above is the entire elementary school.  Yes, we could fit all the kids and teachers in one photo.  (I'm the goober in the second row, third from the left in the furry vest. I freaking loved that vest. My buddy Melissa Edmondson is next to me, and that's Austin Wallace on my left. I wonder whatever happened to him...)  On to my point...

Every kid complains about school lunch, but I was a particularly picky kid, and barely ate any of my lunch at school.  I thought I didn't like anything they served, and I still cringe at the smell of green peas.  Looking back, we had a wonderful lunchroom, and I didn't appreciate it at the time.  There were two sweet ladies that cooked delicious and nutritious food for us every day--Alice Shook and Cordelia Zahorski.  Although I was picky about A LOT, there's still a list of things I loved that Alice and Cordelia made:  taco salad, bierox, sauerkraut (I realize it's really weird that a picky kid like me liked sauerkraut), cooked carrots (don't make fun, they were delicious), Jello salad, and they spoiled us with homemade hot rolls at least once a week.  

Aside from those meals, we all got especially excited about soup and chili day.  You got to pick between soup or chili; I always chose chili.  But it wasn't the chili that we were so excited about, even though it was always really good.  It was the fact that along with our steaming bowl of deliciousness, we got a cinnamon roll.  Sometimes the cooks made them, and sometimes they would have Ruby Sharp make them.

Ruby was a very nice lady that lived in Dacoma that made the most delicious cinnamon rolls.  She made them for the school, and she would also make them to sell in the concession stand at the basketball games.  They were always really tall and pillowy-soft.  And on top of those cinnamony-sugary clouds of wonderful was an apricot glaze PLUS a powdered sugar glaze.  Oh, how we all loved Ruby's cinnamon rolls, and I have missed them so much over the years.  Until tonight.

Right before Christmas, Southern Living magazine inspired me to make cinnamon rolls to enjoy on Christmas morning.  I used the recipe that was published in the magazine, and all seemed to be going well until I tasted them.

Just look at that dough rolled out to perfection.  I had such high expectations, and they didn't pan out. 

I'm probably being a little hard on myself. How can bread rolled up with a pile of butter, cinnamon and sugar be all that bad?  They were okay.  But when you grow up getting cinnamon rolls from people that make breads as well as Ruby and my mom, you expect that your own rolls would be that good, especially on Christmas morning. 

I have since figured out that I didn't let them rise enough, I used a disposable aluminum pan, and I used a recipe from a magazine.  Not that magazine recipes are bad, but cinnamon rolls are one of those things that you need a recipe from someone who knows what they're doing. 

I told my mom about my failure.  My mom is a fantastic cook, and she's especially good at breads. She's another one that spoiled me with homemade goodies all the time.  She quickly equipped me with the Oklahoma Wheat Commission's bread contest winners cookbook and a few others.  And then, she she said, "Oh yeah, I have Ruby Sharp's recipe, do you want it?" "Heck yes I want it!"

So tonight, I mustered up the courage and made the cinnamon rolls for us to hopefully enjoy on our ski trip next weekend.  I was pretty nervous about it, but I took one bite and was taken back to sixth grade.  I posted a picture of them to Facebook and had at least three requests for the recipe. It was in one of Mom's cookbooks, so I don't have any super secret knowledge.  Here's the recipe for everyone to enjoy.  Note:  you don't have to do the apricot glaze.  These would be really good with the powdered sugar glaze or any other icing you like.

Ruby Sharp's Cinnamon Rolls

Rolls:

1 c. lukewarm water

2 pkg. active dry yeast

1 tsp. sugar

1 c. lukewarm milk

6 c. flower

1/2 c. butter or margarine, melted and cooled slightly

2 eggs, slightly beaten

2/3 c. sugar

1 tbsp. salt

Filling:

1/4 c. melted butter

2 tbsp. brown sugar

desired amount of sugar

desired amount of cinnamon

1.  Stir water, yeast and 1 tsp. sugar together and let stand until yeast is dissolved.  

2.  Place warm milk and 2 cups of flour in large stand mixer and beat one minute. 

3.  Add the eggs, 2/3 cup of sugar, salt and margarine.

4.  Add the yeast mixture, then the remaining flour, a little at a time.  Mix until smooth.

5.  Spread flour on countertop, place dough on top and knead until soft dough if formed. The dough hook on the stand mixer will work just fine.

6.  Place dough in buttered pan or bowl and let rise until doubled in bulk.

7.  Roll dough out into a rectangle that's about one inch thick. 

8.  Brush with melted butter, then sprinkle with brown sugar, white sugar, and cinnamon.

9.  Roll as for jelly roll and seal seam.  Cut slices about one inch thick and place into greased pan.  

10.  Let rise until doubled in size.

11.  Bake at 375 for 20 minutes (be careful with this.  My oven cooks hot and I nearly burned them)

12.  Cool and ice as desired.

Apricot Glaze:

1/2 c. Apricot Preserves

1/4 c. Honey

Mix well and top rolls while they're hot. Adjust the honey and preserves for your taste preference. Try not to let the honey overpower the preserves.

Powdered Sugar Glaze:

1 c. powdered sugar

2 tbsp. milk

1 tsp. vanilla

Dump it all into a mixing bowl and mix like the dickens with an electric mixer. Drizzle on top of the rolls.

  Take a look at the tall, pillowy, beautiful cinnamon rolls you will get!